Scribbles

Waking up with a pounding headache, Doom lied in bed staring at his ceiling. It was a Wednesday, which meant he didn't have work. Doom had, quite literally, the worst job on the fucking planet. Every moment he had away from work he relished in. He liked going there for like, one reason, but even that wasn't enough to make him enjoy his job. He hated it. Truly, genuinely, hated it. He was at least happy he could work with his sister, but honestly she didn't even deserve it. He'd prefer if it were just him, but he couldn't change it. All he could do was live. But to be honest? Even that could be hard.

On this day, as mentioned before, he was lazing around with no energy to get out of bed and do anything. It was still morning AND his day off, so he could sleep in a bit. His head was killing him, though. After about thirty minutes of lying there he heard a knock on his door. His sister always made sure to knock before coming in his room. "Bro-bro?" she called through it. Doom sighed and sat upright, and lugged himself out of bed and walked to the door. He opened it, and saw Mood standing there, already dressed for the day in a light blue sundress. Doom was still in his pajamas. "Hi bro-bro! I made breakfast if you want some!" she smiled, ever so brightly.

he brooding rat sank into his shoulders. "O-OH, THANKS, SIS. UM... I'LL BE OUT IN A MINUTE," he told her, before closing the door. He went and got dressed. Mood made clothes for both of them because no stores (that they knew of) accommodated eight-limbed anthries. He pulled on a long sleeved black shirt, struggling to slide all his arms through the sleeves. It was difficult sometimes. Once he'd dressed he walked out of his room and down the hall. Their apartment- apart from their bedrooms- was painted yellow, comically accented with cheese patterns. Doom's room was painted black with skulls, and Mood's room was blue with rainbow touches. It suited their personalities quite appropriately.

A few moments later Doom reached the kitchen, which also had a small square dining table in it. It had four seats, for when Rem and her daughter would come over. Today though, it was just Doom and his sister. Doom liked that. It wasn't that he disliked Mood's girlfriend, he just struggled to be around them when they were together. And Rem wasn't particularly fond of him, which didn't help. Sitting on the kitchen table was two omelettes. Mood was already sitting down, waiting for him to join her. She even set out a drink for him and herself, two glasses of water. Doom smiled and sat down at the table. "GOOD MORNING SIS," he greeted, picking up the fork that had been set out for him.

"G'morning bro-bro!!! I hope you slept well!" his sister beamed. She was way too enthusiastic for 8:30 in the morning. She seemed to always be really high-energy, regardless of the time. Doom gave a not as enthusiastic nod, but not necessarily a depressed one.

"I SLEPT OKAY, THANKS..." That wasn't really true. He NEVER slept okay. He struggled with horrible insomnia, and was plagued by nightmares whenever he did sleep. However, that night was free of any bad dreams, so he didn't feel as terrible as usual. "I HOPE YOU DID TOO," he added, giving a weak smile.

Mood kinda picked up on the truth and gave a sympathetic frown. "I'm sorry bro-bro. I wish your sleep meds helped..." she murmured a bit quieter. He wished so too, but he didn't say that, just nodded again. "Are you going to be doing anything today?" Mood asked.

Doom thought about the question. Was he? He didn't really have any plans other than just resting, day off and all. "I DUNNO. I MIGHT DRAW..." he pondered. Doom didn't really have many hobbies. He liked drawing and... uh... relaxing. That wasn't a lot. "WHAT ABOUT YOU SIS?"

"I was thinking of going to the park, since there's no work. I like sitting outside in the sunshine! Do you wanna come with me?" Mood asked hopefully. She tried really hard to get her brother out of the house, he was always cooped up off work. It wasn't healthy for his only outside interaction to be... that. Doom wasn't really expecting the question and wasn't entirely sure if he felt up to going out.

"UHH... MAYBE. I JUST... HAVE TROUBLE GETTING OUT..." he admitted sadly. The outside world kind of scared him sometimes, and he felt safer in the confines of his bedroom. "M-MAYBE REM COULD GO WITH YOU..." Doom mumbled.

"But I wanna go with you! You never go anywhere besides work. It's not good for you! Don't you wanna breathe some fresh air and soak up some rays in the cool breeze?"

"NOT REALLY."

Mood squinted at him. "So you're saying you want to sit and your room and draw ALL day?"

"P-PRETTY MUCH."

His sister folded her arms at him, frowning more. "I refuse to let you continue to isolate yourself! You're coming with me!!!" the rat insisted. Doom clenched his fork tightly. He did NOT want to go.

"WHAT'S IN IT FOR ME? WHAT DO I GET OUT OF IT?" he shot at her.

"Emotional stability? Good mental health? Less being surrounded by nothing but your thoughts? Seriously bro-bro, it's not rocket science. You deserve to be happy. This will make you feel better if you just try!!!" Mood encouraged with all her heart. Deep inside, Doom knew she was right. His sister ALWAYS knew best when it came to this "mental health" stuff, and he couldn't deny that even if he wanted to. Mood read so many psychology and wellness books, and she'd basically soaked up all the knowledge like a positivity sponge. He sat there for several moments digesting her words, despite the fact they'd been chewed long, long ago.

"...F-FINE," Doom uttered, shivering a bit. "I'LL GO WITH YOU..."

Mood smiled again widely, radiating joy like light from the sun. "YAY!!!" she cheered. "Let's finish eating, then we can go! I'll bring snacks!" The two of them scarfed down their meals, or at least Mood did- Doom took his sweet time eating that breakfast, to the point Mood had to hurry him up. "Come on! Stop stalling! I'll put a lunchbox together with snacks." She got up from the table and walked over to the cupboard and got out a box of crackers. She put them in a little plastic baggy. She also got some cheese from the fridge, and two apple juice boxes. By the time she'd finished putting the snack pack together Doom STILL wasn't done. "I'll turn off the internet when I go to bed if you don't hurry," Mood threatened, and Doom got the message. He scrambled to finish eating, then drank from his water cup until it was empty. He took a deep breath and sat the glass down on the table. "Good! Now let's go!" Mood said.

The two of them got ready to leave. Doom got his sketchbook and pencil case so he could draw, and put on his outdoors coat/cape thing. He wore that whenever he went out. because of self consciousness about his extra limbs. Mood wasn't self conscious like him, so she didn't need to wear anything like that. The two of them left the house with Mood carrying the lunch box and Doom holding his art supplies under his coat. They went down the stairwell and to their car, and got in. Mood always drove, even though Doom knew how to drive. He just struggled with it because of the limbs. They left the apartment complex and drive through Citycountrytown in the direction of the park. Doom watched the cars on the road pass by through the passenger seat window, sighing. "Be optimistic! You might enjoy this," Mood spoke after a bit of silence.

"EMPHASIS ON THE MIGHT," Doom replied, squinting. He didn't think he was going to like this outing. Eventually they reached the park. Mood pulled into a parking space on the street, and they got out. It was the Cit-coun-ton park, closer to the middle of town. They usually passed by it on the way to work. The two of them walked down the sidewalk and into the park. Doom tightened his grip on his sketchbook as they walked.

"Isn't this nice?" Mood smiled as they strolled peacefully. Doom gave an uninterested shrug, but you couldn't really see it with his coat on. The sun was very bright, and it practically hurt his eyes. He was too used to staring at a computer screen all day, and being inside. Natural light was very foreign to him. "It feels good right?" she spoke again, trying to get her brother to talk. Doom looked at Mood.

"UHH... SURE." But he shook his head as he said this, clearly meaning the opposite. Mood sighed, a little frustrated. She led him through the park and towards a little pond, and brought him beside a little tree that was in front of it. She sat down and patted the ground for him to join her. Doom did so, struggling a bit to keep his body under the coat while sitting down. Sitting in a chair was easier, but the straight-up ground was a challenge.

"Now we're in the shade. How do you feel?" Mood asked him. Doom looked down at the grass quietly, not responding at first.

"F-FINE..." he answered, but Mood could tell that was not the case.

"You're not fine. You're upset," Mood murmured with disappointment. Doom felt badly about the way she said this, knowing he was letting her down.

"I-IT'S JUST HARD FOR ME TO GET OUT SIS... I STRUGGLE..." he told her. Mood didn't really respond, she just sighed and leaned against the tree quietly, looking out at the water. Doom opened up his sketchbook and flipped to a blank page and started to draw, just doodling aimlessly. He drew scribbles to let out some of his frustration and guilt at disappointing his sister like that. Mood eventually looked over his shoulder and started watching him, and he felt her eyes on his paper. She said nothing though, and soon opened up the lunchbox. She put a little cracker sandwich together and started eating it, and made a second one, offering it to her brother. Doom gently took the snack and ate it. "THANK YOU," he appreciated.

Mood gave a little nod. "The least I can do..." Doom kept drawing, and Mood occasionally made another cracker sandwich for him to eat as he did so. He got out the juicebox with two of his free hands and drank from it. They were still both fairly quiet for a while, and the silence was getting uncomfortable. "Are you feeling any better?" Mood finally asked to break it.

Her brother looked up, then back at his sketchbook which he'd started shading with scribbles. "A BIT..." he answered, not entirely sure if that was true.

"I just... want you to feel better. You're so unhappy bro-bro. Being in your room all day when you're off work is doing more harm than good," Mood told him. He knew she was right. He knew that. "You need to do more than draw and um... all day. We really should do this more."

Doom looked down sadly. "I KNOW, SIS, I KNOW... I JUST... I FEEL SO OVERWHELMED BY THE OUTSIDE WORLD, IT FEELS LIKE TOO MUCH TO HANDLE. I FEEL AFRAID A LOT."

"You'll feel less afraid the more you do it. You'll feel better. You just need to try, like you did today," Mood promised him. "Do you believe me?"

That was hard to say. Did he believe her? Yes, he did, but it was still so, so hard to accept. He didn't know how to deal with it. Doom doubted himself in every area, and this area was no exception. Doom looked down at the scribbles and shading over the paper of his sketchbook and questioned this. Those scribbles and shades were a lot like the scattered feelings he had inside that clouded his judgement and made it hard to recognize what was true and what wasn't. He didn't know what to think. He didn't know if he was ready to open up to the outside yet, and let all that light in. Do you believe me? Her words were like an echo chamber in his brain. Did he? Did he?

"I... I DON'T KNOW," he finally answered after a long silence. "IT'S HARD TO BELIEVE ANYTHING RIGHT NOW..."

"That's okay," Mood held his hand. "I'm here to reassure you, bro-bro."

"...THANKS, SIS."

"You're welcome."